Today is, today is
Today is quiet in my town
Today is, oh, today is
Today is too quiet in my town
I remember what I was doing, I remember the feeling, I remember the agony like it happened all over again today.
It’s been 3 years since the amazing, joyful, handsome Canadian that we know as Cory Monteith died.
If you would have asked me 3 years ago, I don’t think I’d believe that I am here now, in front of my computer, writing about him and that awful day.
I woke up, I checked my phone and I had a private message from a friend on twitter that said “I am sorry about what happened to Cory”, and you know, when you just wake up, you can’t understand, you are still sleeping, and I thought she was talking about when he went to rehab to cure himself, but no. I opened twitter and madness was on, I couldn’t believe it, I couldn’t talk about it.
That was probably one of the longest days of my life, I’ve cried that night a lot, I was working and there was the game that night so big screens were on and after the game there were the news and he was on every single screen and it was hard for me to work while I was seeing his face everywhere.
I know, I didn’t know him, I don’t even understand why his death had such a bad impact on me but when you love someone so much and you look up to it and you see him as a bright star in your life, you will get fucked up, truly.
Cory was and is the best actor that I’ve ever known, he HAS NEVER been his addiction, NEVER. He fought till the end, unfortunately, that bitch won. But I don’t remember him on how he died, I remember him as a goofy guy that couldn’t dance at all, a guy that found difficult to talk and walk at the same time, a guy that was living his life truly and deeply and that he was what kept that cast (Glee) close. He never had a fight with any of them, he never said a bad word about anything. He was a genuine guy, that really appreciated the love and the second chance that was give to him.
And the most amazing thing, he SINCERELY loved his fans more than anything, he was stopping by for hours just to make them happy, taking pictures or signing posters.
And you wanna know how I am sure about all these things? Cause I know. I can feel it. (on the other side, no one, as ever blame him for how he died, they all remembered him for who he was)
Cory has affected so many lives for good. His death touched billions of people. Between these people there is me.
The girl that really hoped one day to meet him and tell him how much, she was thankful for everything he did for her, for make her feel worthy, for making her fight back. (He still does make me do all these things).
It took me 3 years to watch old episodes of Glee, I couldn’t, and honestly it wasn’t that easy, especially his last season, the fact that that was his last scene, hit me like a train.
But I need to start to remember him and be happy, not tears anymore, he wouldn’t want us to do this. So let’s just toast to the love and affection that we still have for him after 3 long years.
you are truly missed, there’s no day passing by that I don’t think about you. I really hope you found your peace, wherever you are. I believe that you are still drumming and making everybody happy. I am sure you are looking down to your mom, family and friends..to Lea and help them to recover from this still fresh wound.
I miss you a lot,